Purifying the people of society from bad traits inwardly and outwardly and adorning them with good qualities, moulding them into the individuals of high moral character of our society are the big tasks and the ways of the blessed Prophets عَـلَـيْهِمُ السَّلَام. The person who gives Tarbiyyah should be of excellent character, he should have eagerness for wishing well for others, he should possess the attitude of pardoning others and having tolerance, he should remain cheerful and happy and wear smile on his face according to the situation as well as he should be elegant and should have the fear of Allah عَزَّوَجَلَّ.
If we want to make other Muslims truthful and see their success in this life and the Hereafter and want to succeed, we need to give them Tarbiyyah in a good manner. One of the things that are taken into account whilst giving Tarbiyyah in a good manner is to take one’s nature and disposition into consideration and Tarbiyyah be given in a wise and strategic way. Understanding one’s psyche for giving him Tarbiyyah holds great importance. In this connection, Tarbiyyah given by our Holy Prophet صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم is an excellent example, and we must also remember that the blessed intellect bestowed upon the Holy Prophet صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم is many times greater than the intellect of others. The intellect of the most intelligent person cannot even reach any of part of the blessed intellect of the Holy Prophet صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم. Let’s read a parable regarding the blessed Tarbiyyah given by the Holy Prophet’s صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم:
Blessings of refraining from lying
Once a person came in the court of the Holy Prophet صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم and humbly said: ‘I want to accept faith [Iman] in you but I love alcohol, adultery, theft and lying. People have told me that you have declared these things Haraam. I do not have power to refrain myself from these things. If you prohibit me from any one of these things, I will accept Islam.’ The Holy Prophet صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم said: ‘Stop telling lies.’ He accepted this and embraced Islam. After leaving the court of the Holy Prophet صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم, when people offered him alcohol, he said [to himself]: If I drink alcohol and the Holy Prophet صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم asks me with regard to this and I lie, I will be breaking the promise I made with the Holy Prophet صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم and if I speak the truth, I will be punished (Shari’ah punishment). Therefore, he quit [drinking] alcohol. Similarly, he also had same [kinds of] thoughts when there were the matters of adultery and theft, so he refrained from [committing] these sins. When he came again in the court of the Holy Prophet صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم, he [humbly] said: ‘[O Beloved Rasool صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم!] You [truly] did a great thing. You stopped me from lying, [and] the doors of other sins also closed on me.’ Thus this person repented of all of his sins. (Tafseer-e-Kabeer, Part 11, Al-Taubah, Taht-al-Ayah 119, vol. 6, pp. 167)
How great insight the Holy Prophet صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم had that he, by the Noor [light] of His blessed intellect, knew that by virtue of giving up lying, that man would stop other sins. It is why the Holy Prophet صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم advised him to stop lying, and truly he repented of all of his sins.
Taught etiquette of eating food
Let’s read another parable of the Holy Prophet صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم about teaching etiquette regarding eating food with great affection and strategic way. The blessed son of Umm-ul-Mu`mineen, Sayyidatuna Umm-e-Salmah رَضِىَ اللّٰهُ عَـنْهَا, ‘Sayyiduna Amr Bin Abu Salmah رَضِىَ اللّٰهُ عَـنْهُ ‘said: I was under the blessed care of the Holy Prophet صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم. (While eating), my hand would go around in the bowl. The Beloved Prophet صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم said: ‘يَا غُلامُ سَمِّ اللّٰهَ وَكُلْ بيَمِينكَ وَكُلْ مِمَّا يَلِيكَ’ O Son! Recite بسم اللّٰه, eat with your right hand, [and] eat from what is near you.’ (Sayyiduna ‘Amr Bin Abu Salmah رَضِىَ اللّٰهُ عَـنْهُ said:) ‘After that I always kept eating in this manner.’ (Bukhari, vol. 3, pp. 521, Hadees 5376)
May we be sacrificed upon the great way of the blessed teaching of the Holy Prophet صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم! He gave advice in a beautiful and caring way. Firstly, he صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم mentioned the etiquette of eating so that he (Sayyiduna ‘Amr رَضِىَ اللّٰهُ عَـنْهُ`) does not feel that he was being singled out as well as the Holy Prophet صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم taught him the etiquettes in this way that one should eat from what is in near him in the plate and corrected him in such a manner that it seemed as though the final words were like a piece of advice like other general instructions.
Dear Islamic brothers! If we want to give correct Tarbiyyah to others, we will have to read the blessed Seerah [biography] of the Holy Prophet صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم in order to know that how he reformed others in a wise and strategic way taking into account their nature and psyche. It is mentioned in Tafseer-e-‘Azeezi: There are 100 parts of intellect, from which 99 parts have been granted to the Holy Prophet صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم. Whoever wants to know the intellect of the Holy Prophet صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم, he should closely read the Seerah books. (Tafseer Azeezi, translated, vol. 3, pp. 61)
Read another parable of Tarbiyyah:
Wealth of the heirs
Once the Holy Prophet صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم asked the blessed companions عَـلَيْهِمُ الرِّضْوَان: ‘Who amongst you likes the wealth of his heirs more than his own wealth?’ The blessed companions humbly said: ‘There is no one from us who loves the wealth of heirs more than his own wealth.’ The Holy Prophet صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم said: ‘Whoever has sent his wealth forward (through giving charity), that is his own wealth and whatever [he] left behind, that is the wealth of his heirs.’ (Musnad Ahmad, vol. 2, pp. 23, Hadees 3626)
It is my plea to all the devotees of Rasool that they should contribute towards giving Tarbiyyah to the individuals of our society and make individual efforts for this cause in a wise and strategic way. May Allah عَزَّوَجَلَّ grant us the ability to not only reform ourselves but also reform others with wisdom according to Shari’ah.
اٰمِيۡن بِجَاهِ النَّبِيِّ الۡاَمِيۡن صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيۡهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم
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